


How Not To Date

by Hughville



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-18 11:48:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18120203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hughville/pseuds/Hughville
Summary: Emma explains to Hook how dating works in modern day Storybrooke.





	How Not To Date

**Author's Note:**

  * For [isaballerina89](https://archiveofourown.org/users/isaballerina89/gifts), [athousandsmiles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/athousandsmiles/gifts).



> Another fic from my hard drive. It takes place after the S3 episodes, _Snow Drifts_ and _There's No Place Like Home_.

“Soon, Cap’n?”  
“Yes, Smee, soon. Just go down to the end of the dock,” Hook requested. Smee scuttled down the dock and the darkness swallowed him. Hook made a few final adjustments to the table he set up on the end of the dock. If he still had the Jolly Roger…he shook his head. No point dwelling on things past. His future awaited him and her name was Emma.  
“Smee!” he called out. “Go fetch her!”  
“Aye, Cap’n,” came Smee’s faint reply.

Emma walked down Main Street on her way to Granny’s. Odd things occurred daily since she and Hook returned from The Enchanted Forest. Though summer bloomed, the air held a constant chill and trails of frost crisscrossed the town and forest. She tried to get Regina to help but she refused to even speak to Emma. Emma felt a pang of guilt as she thought of Robin Hood and Marian. She shook her head. How was she to know that the woman she saved would turn out to be Robin’s wife? Sighing, she rounded the corner when a heavy blanket was thrown over her and she was hoisted off her feet. A loud grunt escaped her as she struggled to get free but whoever held her slung her up and over his shoulder. She kicked, screamed and tried to hit. Nothing she did freed her from her captor. Finally she was set on her feet and the blanket pulled off. In a flash, she had her gun out and pointed at Hook.  
“What the hell?” she yelled.   
Hook looked over her shoulder. “You brainless twit!” he snarled. “I told you to fetch her not kidnap her! And you got Anton involved in your idiocy?”  
Emma holstered her gun and turned around. Smee stood twisting his red cap in his hands. Anton stood beside him looking confused.  
“You told me Emma knew about this,” Anton stated looking at Smee with anger simmering in his eyes.  
“I fetched her, Cap’n,” Smee whispered. He looked at Emma pleadingly. “He told me to fetch you.” Anton grabbed his arm and pulled the smaller man down the dock toward Storybrooke.  
“Of course he did.” She turned to look at Hook. “Maybe if you’d said escort?”  
Hook grimaced and nodded. “Aye. I’m sorry, Swan. I just wanted our first date to be special.” He moved aside revealing the table. Two tapers burned steadily in the center the light glinting off the two cloches, silverware and crystal glasses. A bottle of wine sat open on one side.  
“Okay,” Emma said as she approached Hook. She stopped in front of him and ran her hand over his chest. Looking up into his eyes, she smiled. “Here, in this land, you don’t kidnap your dates. You ask her to have dinner with you and then pick her up.”  
Hook gently lifted her off her feet. “Like this?” he breathed, his mouth inches from hers.  
Emma brushed her lips lightly against his. With a swift movement, she slid from his grasp and landed on the deck. “Nope.”  
Hook laughed and bowed low. “Would you do me the honor of dining with me this evening?”  
“Yes.”  
Hook moved to pull her chair out. Once she was seated, he sat across from her. He poured some wine into her glass.  
“So, what did Granny fix?” Emma asked.  
“You know, I could have prepared this meal,” Hook pouted.  
“Unh huh.”  
Hook lifted both cloches and set them on the deck. Emma smiled with delight.  
“This is something called a hamburger,” Hook told her. “And those are chili…” He frowned as he tried to remember the rest.  
“Chili cheese fries! How did you know?”  
He shrugged. “I asked young Henry. He said this is one of your favorite meals.”  
“You asked Henry. That’s very sweet and very unlike you.”  
Hook laughed and reached across the table to take her hand. “I’m trying.”  
Emma squeezed his hand and smiled. “Thank you.”  
Hook released her hand and looked down at his plate. Carefully, he lifted the hamburger and cursed when lettuce, tomatoes, and pickles fell in his lap.  
Emma picked up her knife and reached across the table, intending to cut his burger for him. Hook dropped his burger and reached for her at the same time. Their hands collided and knocked over both candles. Within seconds, the table and its contents went up in flames. Hook flipped the whole table into the sea.  
Emma stood on the deck laughing. “The hook is very handy,” she told him and then doubled over with laughter.  
“This entire date thing is ridiculous!” he yelled wiping food off his breeches. “I fail to see the humor in all this!”  
Emma stood up and wrapped her arms around him. Hook felt his anger melt away as she snuggled up against him. He kissed the top of her head.  
“This does not bode well for us, Swan,” he whispered against her hair.  
She pulled back and took his hand. “Let’s go to Granny’s and I’ll tell you all about how dating works.”  
They began to walk down the dock. “At least the fish will eat hearty tonight,” Hook said.  
Emma wrapped her arm around his waist. “Hopefully Granny still has some chili cheese fries left.”


End file.
